Finding himself unable to contain his jealousy toward his fellow lawmaker’s latest poll numbers, House Speaker Paul Ryan reportedly pulled aside Rep. Joe Wilson (R-SC) Friday to ask him what the secret is behind his 37 percent approval rating. CONT. The Onion Read more »
Onion Explains: How Presidential Approval Ratings Are Calculated
Open-Minded Man Tries To Get News From Variety Of Facebook Friends
Stressing the importance of hearing all sides of a story, open-minded man Brendan Kelly told reporters Friday that he always tries to get his news from a variety of Facebook friends. “For a long time, I’d just get news from my buddy Mark, but then I realized how much I […] Read more »
A list of words that trigger Post Traumatic Election Stress Disorder
Journalists haven’t yet finished their autopsy on the 2016 election, but they’re already handicapping 2018 and 2020 — who will run? Who will win? It’s enough to make you understand why millennials want “trigger warnings.” To defend America from Post Traumatic Election Stress Disorder, let’s call a moratorium on the […] Read more »
Real News Goes Viral
Arctic sea ice goes missing! … Governments use this one weird trick to stifle dissent … You’re gonna die! — eventually, but possibly sooner without health care … CONT. Brian McFadden, The Strip, New York Times Read more »
Most say only turkeys will talk politics at the table
Americans say that this Thanksgiving they are most thankful for their family, but they really hope that Aunt Ann won’t ask about politics as she passes the mashed potatoes. A new CNN/ORC poll finds that 53% of Americans say they dread the thought of talking politics over Thanksgiving dinner on […] Read more »